Girl With An Existential Crisis: Part 1

An open letter to my boyfriend that I wrote on a sleepless night..

Hi stranger. This was probably one of your better ideas since I haven’t been sleeping at all since we last spoke and it’s now 4:46 in the morning. But it’s kind of nice because you’ve been keeping me company this whole time..& I’m hoping to god that fellow Verizon folks do in fact have unlimited talk or, “my ass will be grass,” as my Dad would say.

Guess what we watched together last night while you were asleep? Me Earl & The Dying Girl which took a partially unexpected turn at the end. I got this sick feeling in my stomach which replaced a moment where I’d normally be crying. Mostly because the main guy who’s name is Greg, lied to me right from the beginning of the film. He said, “bear with me, I promise she gets better,” while talking about Rachel, the girl who’s sick with leukemia. But she didn’t. She slipped into a coma while she was watching the movie Greg made for her and met with death ten days later. I’m pretty sure that sick feeling I got is one I’ve experienced before when other promises have been broken to me in my life. “Friends forever.” “I’m here for you.” “I’m not going anywhere..I promise.” Lies. I’m not sure if anything frustrates me more than someone going back on their word…well maybe Donald Trump..although Trump and lying kind of go hand in hand. But you’re not like any of those people boyfriend. You pinky promise and stay true to your word and that means more than you’ll ever know.

So even though it’s 4:56 a.m. now and I shouldn’t be trying to fall asleep when the birds begin singing, it’s been nice having you by my side. Thank you for calling me at 1 am & deciding you want to fall asleep on the phone with me. Tonight I didn’t spend the evening alone. Plus you and I took out a new movie involving life and death and all that jazz. Great film for a chick going through an existential crisis, right?

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